10:14 p.m. - 2009-04-30
Sick of Walking in Hell
haha um i feel like a dork.
because of several things.
that im lonely,
going to prom alone,
and still phucking afraid of the caf..
oh plus that guy who dumped me is like a playa.
and what am i? nothing???
like, he is who he is, which makes dating him disaster. and i can never love him.
im seriously gonna fucking kill myself if things dont get better.
fuck.this.shit.
like, i HAVE to get revenge. it is the only thing that will help.
oh, and im finally excited for graduation.
i need to get the fuck out of here.
8:46 p.m. - 2009-04-16
Not Even Sorry
hahhahahahahahaha i just got WEAK.
so like it has to get worse before it gets better, right?
then, i didnt know it would get better.
but once it did, i was set.
like, he could do no wrong
and, of course he hadnt hurt me before...
the fifth times the charm. was the charm.
ultimate betrayal broke my heart.
hahaha AGAIN. yeah, im stupid.
but at least i can say i got what i wanted even though it took me FOREVER.
the point is i shouldnt have wanted it in the first place.
but as you can see, no longer moping over someone who won't even talk to me.
just working on myself. and these supposed artis-dreaded guys? idk.
i just know if im hot, i wont have anything else to worry about.
so i should probably get on that.
like, now.
6:03 p.m. - 2009-02-18
Love/Hate?
ohhmaGAWD
im such an IDIOT. the biggest loser.
the stupidest bitch. the slowest retard.
but i had to fall for him again, didnt i?
because i never got up the first time.
i had to love him. i had to get him again.
i had to be a whore. because i WAS.
but who falls for someone, who did them wrong THREE TIMES?
and u think theyre not guna hurt you again.
i do. me, the retard. well, that WAS me.
this time i'm gonna be DIFFERENT.
if he still wants his ex, i dont care.
actually, i do. i'm a woman obsessed.
but this time i wont go all the way.
hes not getting what he wants.
but i cant just BREAK it off.
no matter how much i want to. i have to really HURT him, yknow?
get him there as close as i can where, he thinks i can do no wrong, and BAM!!!!
lol....but i cant help pissing him off.
and am i still guna be a whore. i dont even want to. but i cant stop yet, bcuz if he goes back to her,itll KILL me. fuck. him.
go to hell, lochner, go to hell.
5:31 p.m. - 2009-01-28
Nice Day For... A White Wedding
bout the baddest boy i ever seen...
straight up out a movie scene...
who knew he was a drama king...
that'd turn my life to Stephen King's...
okayokay, OKAY OKAY
haha. i'll never stop it. it's the new semester. it kind of suxxcked but im about to make it BETTER.
and im about to not have a 3rd block
that's whats up. cant wait to get my new phone.
ohhh. and HIM. were talking again?!
like, he talked to me?! and i was NICE??
yeah i know, stop righthere
he IS pure arse. there ARE others.
but him coming out of the blue...
and it making me happy..
okay...okay....OKAY... it aint ok.
but i did it. and i dont think i can stop myself from being nice.
and i dont think i want to.
